Meathead - the "main man"

Hello,

My name is Meathead. I am also called Meaty, Juicy or Juice, the Meaters, and Meathead Agustus (sometimes my grandma calls me the King). My papa is a Marine (discharged in the 90's) - and the English Bull Dog is the Marines mascot - and "meathead" is a term marines use with each other ... go figure! So it all fits together. And the names Juicy or Juice? - Well all well bred bulldogs drool. And I am most certainly well bred!

I came first. My papa bought me I was just 3 months old. I was pretty scared the first night with papa, but rapidly - like by the next day - I realized I had landed in "lollipop land". I had a papa, a grandma, an auntie and a MoMo (my papa's girlfriend). Life was sweet.

And those early years were happy days. I was the main attraction and didn't have to share the spot light with anyone. And I could eat McDonald's french fries, taste wine, got good cookies from the table, went for walks by a lake with my grandma where we ate cookies on a bench (yes, I sat on the bench beside my grandma. That was before I realized that bulldogs like me don't like walking - I stopped that pretty quickly.) Those were the days!

Somewhere along the line, my papa decided I was lonely and needed company. I don't know where he got that idea. Must have been some sort of language translation fall out. I probably asked for a new toy and he thought I said a new boy, and he got a Pug. It has gone downhill ever since.

Anyway, as you can see, I am now one of 3 (the slope is a slippery one), but I am the one in charge! I am the King. I am the leader. I am the main man. And I am interested in only one thing ... sleep. Do not get in my way when I am heading for the couch. Do not let the puppy loose when I am snoozing. Do not get another dog unless you are absolutely sure ... that is what is requested.

Just remember who the king is!

Your friend,

Meathead.